The best places to poop in San Francisco
These are some primo spots to drop a deuce if you can’t wait to get home to do it.
Everybody poops. I hate pooping outside my home, and if forced to do it, my friend describes my bathroom habits as positively dainty.
I won’t drop a deuce unless my toilet comes with four secure walls and a latched door lock, and I can’t do cubicles unless the partitions go to the floor. It isn’t the cleanliness that bothers me — although, hard pass on gas stations and Starbucks — but I can’t stand the sounds. The splashes of water, the farts; I deny they come from me, and I abhor hearing them from others. I deny pooping at all.
I asked around and found some primo spots to take a dump in San Francisco. These are my recommendations in no particular order.
Read the latest by Saul Sugarman
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What we’re doing this week
Mill Valley Music Festival
WHEN: May 13 - 14 various times
WHERE: 180 Camino Alto, Mill Valley
The Mill Valley Music Festival is a two-day outdoor arts and culture event produced by the Mill Valley Chamber and Noise Pop Industries, it features a heady, multi-genre mix of diverse national acts and local lights, coupled with world-class food, drink and art for your best friends and the ones you have yet to meet.
Hits! The musical
WHEN: May 8 7:30 P.M.
WHERE: The Palace of Fine Arts
Singing, dancing, hundreds of costume changes and state of the art lighting and sound — Imagine songs like “Signed, Sealed, Delivered,” “Hero,” “I Will Always Love You,” “Singing In The Rain,” and nearly 80 more of America’s most iconic songs performed by the greatest young singers and dancers in the country. The cast is 29 performers, ages 10-22.
Also coming up
Queer Prom at The Chapel, hosted by Peaches Christ
WHEN: June 3rd 8 P.M. - Midnight
WHERE: The Chapel 777 Valencia St.
Impulse SF is kicking off Pride month with a queer prom night for the ages. Come dressed in whatever makes you feel fabulous and be ready to dance and kiki the night away. This promotion is sticky for the month because Saul Sugarman — editor in chief of The Bold Italic — is designing many gowns that any attendee can sign up and wear. Tickets for this event are free.
The Bold Italic is brought to you by GrowSF and edited by Saul Sugarman. Send us a pitch, a question, comment, or advertise with us: info@thebolditalic.com
love this story, Saul. At last, news we can use.